Scared to love again

Romantic Relationships
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My ex of six years broke up with me 11 years ago. I neither dated nor entertained anyone until three months ago. I finally decided to love again. After a month of dating, he dumped me. I realized that he just wanted me for my money. He would ask me to buy him clothes and apparel. I did but said no on the third request. Guys can be gold-diggers too!

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I’m sorry to hear that, but you’re right; bad behavior is not exclusive to any gender.

Something I always tell my clients is that any type of relationship, romantic or otherwise, always carries risk. That’s just the truth of it. Just because someone says you can trust them doesn’t mean you automatically owe them that; you still have to be the one to decide whether or not they are worthy of your trust. Having this mindset can be helpful in moving on to new relationships because you’re more tentative and are less likely to over commit.

You just really have to ask yourself, “how much am I willing to risk in this relationship?” Whatever answer you get would be a good point of reflection. If these reflections ever get too heavy or if you want someone else’s opinion on the matter, you can always talk to friends and loved ones as a good soundboard. But if you’re looking for something deeper, maybe understanding your patterns or looking to improve certain behaviors, you can always try looking for professional help.

Anyway, it’s a good thing you spotted this behavior from your recent ex. I’m hoping that you find the space to breathe and reflect before taking your next risk. :slight_smile:

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I know its painful yet at the same time it’s also a blessing you were able to get out of that kind of situation/circumstance/“relationship”… :mending_heart:

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I’m really sorry you had to go through that. It’s tough to feel like your trust was taken advantage of, especially after waiting so long to open up to love again. But it’s impressive that you were able to recognize that behavior and put a stop to it. :clap:t2: How are you coping with everything? :people_hugging:

P.S.
Getting back into the dating world can be daunting, especially after experiencing disappointment. Don’t be “scared” to love again. You can take things at your own pace—get to know potential partners gradually and build trust step by step… :wink: :muscle:t2: :heart_hands:

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